Thumb your nose at cancer

StPaulsub Clio has a great money-raising idea ... it's called 'Thumb your nose at cancer' and she 's taking SL snapshots of avatars with pink noses to raise money for Relay for Life of Second Life. Here's Poppy (yes, moi) with a pink nose ...

Under the hammer - survivors and caregivers raise over $L300K!

Sunday June 1 SL Cancer Survivors and SL Cancer Caregivers joined together to organize an Art Auction of works by RL and SL artists to raise money for cancer research. All proceeds went to Relay For Life of Second Life.

More than 50 awesome works by 23 artists were collected by AnnieHall Bates. A panel of judges consisting of Fayandria Foley, Tayzia Abattoir, William Richelieu and Isolde Flamand selected the works that went into a live auction at the Relay For Life Halfway There Fair, and there was a silent auction of the remaining works in the Welcome Center on the American Cancer Society island from Tuesday May 27 to Sunday June 1.

Some of the works on sale at the survivors/caregivers art auction. In the foreground, one of my favorites - "Guardian", by Random Calliope, which raised $L55,000.

The bidders gather as Chase Marellan starts off the live auction

Synergy Devonshire helped with setting out the works and LadyKay Gable jumped in along with some of her friends to set up the silent auction, which turned out to be more of a challenge than we had expected getting the auction scripts to work. Marissa Goodliffe built the auctioneer's podium and with the help of live auctioneer Chase Marellan we managed to raise over $L300,000! WOOT!

"Out of the Fog" by Artistic Fimicoloud was purchased by a consortium of members of the RFL of SL Planning Committee and raised an awesome $L45,000. The work is now on display at the ACS Welcome Center.

Artistic Fimicoloud

Our dear dear friend Fimi has passed ...

While we fight away our tears, let's remember that Fimi was an inspiration, a true fighter, who touched everyone with her ability to enjoy life and have fun during these last precious years, and her work and her ideas will live on.

The following words are from her poem Arms Open Wide, which she read at the ACS dedication ceremony last year.

"For I walk hand in hand with that which life
Has dealt me, thanking the universe for every step I take.
Where once I stood in fear and terror
Of not knowing what life would bring,
Now I stand arms open wide."

Hugs
Poppy

The Sojourner is off line

I have just been to light a candle for The Sojourner, who sadly passed away at the weekend.

The dictionary definition of a sojourner is "a temporary resident". Well, "Soj", as we knew her, certainly made a difference during her sojourn in Second Life. We are already making history in SL. And Soj's name deserves to be writ large in that history. Soj, who was a multiple stroke survivor, was the founder of Dreams, and organized the Dreams Community Fairs ... SL cancer survivors held a panel discussion about support groups in SL at the third Dreams Fair in April this year.

The many tributes to "Soj"

My thoughts go out to her husband and son.

Here are a few of the growing number of tributes on the web:

In memory of The Sojourner (Amalthea Blanc)http://www.flickr.com/photos/tealthea/2523597470/

The Sojourner's Last Voyage (Gwynneth Llewellyn)
http://gwynethllewelyn.net/2008/05/26/the-sojourners-last-voyage/

The Sojourner Has Died (Polysilox)
http://www.koinup.com/Polysilox/work/37328/

Tribute to Fimi

I had some sad news this weekend. Artistic (Fimi) Fimicoloud - the feisty little pink fox in Second Life and the artist Stephanie Koslow in real life - is facing her last journey. Friends of Fimi have been gathering all weekend to wish her strength, to celebrate her life, and to leave tributes at her gallery in Second Life.



Readers of this blog will remember that Fimi --- a metastatic breast cancer survivor --- was one of the first speakers in our survivor-led 'Fighting Spirit" sessions on ACS island and her talk was an inspiration to us all. See: Art from the Heart . And she has also been an active member of SL's Cancer Survivors and of the Relay For Life of Second Life team Passionate Redheads.

A mutual friend, Rob Chandrayaan, has made a moving tribute to Fimi on his blog. See: Rob's Blog.

Poppy goes into a flat spin and comes last ...

On Sunday May 17 I took part in my very first Great Snail Race --- proceeds to benefit Relay For Life of Second Life. The race was organized by Racerx (Bunny) Gullwing, and it was the third race this year to benefit RFL.

I was up against the 'big brass' of RFL of SL --- our Event Chair, Fayandria Foley, our Teams Chair, Tayzia Abattoir, and May Rosebud, who is heading up the new Meeters and Greeters team on ACS island. And another survivor friend, LadyKay Gable. In all, 42 snails took to the road, which crosses 42 sims!

Snails lining up for the start

Despite practicing hard and terrorizing the inhabitants of Azure, my skills are still very rudimentary. When the start gun went off I found myself going off the road and it took forever to get back on, by which time the other snails had an impressive lead.

Poppy meets King Kong

The road is full of treacherous "potholes" and at one time I fell right through a bridge, but with a little help from Fay who tp'd me back onto to the road and to Racer for redirecting me when I lost my way I managed to keep in the race.

Where did that bridge go to?

Not far from the finish line my snail went into a flat spin, and while I was sorting myself out Fay and LadyKay both finished. I walked right through the finish line without touching it, and promptly fell into another hole. While I was straightening myself out May Rosebud came up and finished, so I finally finished last! I don't have any pictures unfortunately, I was too busy trying to straighten up! But you can see the whole race, including my flat spin, on http://slcn.tv/relay-life-giant-snail-race-may.

Holding on to your dreams

This weekend I chaired a panel discussion at the Dreams Community Fair about the value of support in Second Life for people with cancer in real life. With me were Chel Norfolk, Flash Alcott and Ishtar Roux, three cancer survivors in different stages of their treatment, who shared their personal stories and talked about what support means to them. And we were supported by several members of our cancer survivors group who were in the audience.

From left to right: Ish, Flash, Chel, and Poppy

All of our speakers agreed on how difficult it was to tell friends and family in RL when they were first diagnosed. And two of them have direct experience of being supported through their treatment by the friends they've made in SL, and by the support group that meets weekly in Hope Haven.

Chel, who is studying for her PhD, has only recently been diagnosed with cancer and is still discussing with her doctors what is the best course of action to take in her treatment. When she first heard the news she walked around like a zombie for the first few days. She ended up telling a friend in SL who suggested coming the cancer support meetings . At first she was very angry " ... wanting to cuss up a storm yelling at everything". But now, she says, "If it wasn’t for my friends in SL and the support group in Sl I don’t know if I would of had the strength I have to make the decisions I have made I thank everyone of them. I haven’t told many in my RL due to my need to keep my health very private. However those that do know are very supportive and I thank my lucky stars to have everyone of them."

Chel is determined to continue her schooling and to fulfil her love of travel. "I hold on to those dreams. Someone once gave me a keychain that said 'Those that dare to can make a dream come true' ... those are very strong words to me ... this is one of my strengths to look forward to my dreams."

Flash Alcott is now a regular participant in the weekly support meetings and has helped facilitate these sessions, but he describes himself as "... a very .. intensely .. private person" who found it very hard at first to share his cancer diagnosis with anyone. The first two people he told were the father of one of his daughter's schoolfriends, and the "young, hip" hospital chaplain with whom he now has coffee every couple of weeks. And the third?

"Several months ago I 'happened' upon the American Cancer Society Island. It was late one evening and I ran into something that charmed me -- little paper bags with illuminating candle inside (OK, SL versions of these things). You could dedicate a 'luminaria' to a loved one lost to cancer. Anyway, I was 'lighting' one for both my mom and dad and another avatar floated by. I told her I was touched by the simplicity and beauty of these things -- and we started talking. She was a great listener and pretty soon I was sharing - with an avatar I'd never met (and I'm not even sure if I even bothered to look at her profile) - incredibly private stuff about my health. I talked her ears off, I suspect ... but she listened. And she gave me suggestions about things to do, people to talk with. That person - you might have guessed - was Poppy ... All of which led me to a suggestion she made -- becoming involved with the ACS Second Life community. A community that has become one of my strongest sources of support."

(ahem ...)

Flash is now in the middle of his treatment and went on to say "... what I've learned from these people is that human contact is so so so terribly important. That we need to help each other."

Ishtar has now completed her cancer treatment and her prognosis is good. But she remembers that when she heard the diagnosis she felt very alone, and then realized that she had to be the one to tell the people she loved. She attributes getting through it in a large part to her mother, her dog, and her sense of humor ... she made us all laugh with her description of how she managed to tuck away her shunt in her bra ... and how she was chased out of the nuclear medicine corridor because "our giggling was disrupting things".

During the discussion that followed, The Sojourner made the interesting point that different health support groups seem to prefer different approaches. Some, like ours, benefit from having a regular meeting schedule. Others (and she gave the example of stroke survivors) tend not to want regular support, as that can remind them of what they can't control, but do want a crisis line where they can get immediate attention. As Gentle Heron added: "Some of us need routine. Some of us need help when we need it."

Ish is now a team captain for Relay For Life of Second Life. I'll let her have the last word: "Support comes in many ways but one I missed out on was the American Cancer Society and Relay For Life. In so many ways I wish I'd had my wits about me and contacted them. It would have done me so much good to meet others with cancer, and especially survivors. I'm so delighted to be involved now and help others battling cancer."

Brrrr...

Sometimes Real Life outdoes Second Life ...

Cancer Research UK, the UK charity and support organization equivalent to the American Cancer Society, launched its Race For Life recently with a naked training session. Twenty-eight women bared nearly_but_not_quite_all to run in Regents Park, London.

I really am not kidding. To view the plain truth, covered only with strategically situated body paint, see:

http://www.raceforlife.org/allaboutus/officiallaunch2008/

Nudity is a great leveller. And this event must have been quite an attention-catcher, not least because it is really VERY cold in Regents Park in the winter (I should know, I used to live quite near there).

It's been rumored that CRUK may soon establish an official presence in SL, alongside the American Cancer Society and the Association for International Cancer Research. Well, CRUK certainly knows how to make an impact, so we'd all better watch out when they come on in ...

Why Fay Fights ... One Step at a Time

When Fayandria Foley came to Hope Haven to lead a "Fighting Spirit" session on December 20 we had another big turnout - and not only of cancer survivors. Because Fay is not only a survivor herself, she is also Chair of SL's Relay For Life. It was a very timely session to lead in to the kick-off for SL's Relay For Life 2008. And this year's Relay is about Fighting Back.

Fay went to the doctor to check out a small "freckle". When she heard it was melanoma she thought she was going to die, that cancer was a death sentence, and that she didn't want the pain and loss of dignity that she associated with cancer. She had, she says, NO fight in her. She was ready just to sit in a chair and wait for it to happen. But she learned that while it WAS once a death sentence, medical research and technology have taken huge strides forward. Now she's optimistic. And she knows that she doesn't want to die.

Fay doesn't really consider that she herself has fighting spirit. When she was going through treatment, she was simply following a path set out by her doctors. "Right foot, left foot, right foot, take the pain, make it happen ..." But she went on to say "I'm living with cancer, facing what I have and where I'm going. I'm fighting for you, my children, your children, and when it comes down to it I suppose yes I am fighting for me. What made the difference, what got me out of my chair? It was YOU. Thank you for sharing your stories, your life, so that I had a reason to get up and keep going."

Fay's advice for someone who faces the diagnosis of cancer or indeed any catastrophic disease is " ... to look deep inside yourself and see what matters ... to me it's not the house I live in or the car I drive, it's about my friends, the ones who held me when I got my diagnosis and helped me through each step of the treatment. It's about how the children I know will live their lives out."

And above all, she said, "Cancer gave me the motivation to Relay. we have to go out, fight, do battle. My chicken way of sitting in a chair and waiting won't help us win. Relay is a point of meeting, taking, doing, actively participating, getting money for research, and getting money for getting information out there. When you know in your heart that you and your caregiver are facing this thing together Relay gives hope, communication, strength... it also increased my spirituality, made me realise there is a reason why everything happens, why we're walking this track... It's not *my* cancer, it's cancer, and we're going to tackle it together ... "

hmmmm --- if that's not "fighting spirit", I wonder what is?

If you would like a complete text including the Q&A session please IM me, Poppy Zabelin, in Second Life.

We all had a Ball last night...

November is officially Caregivers Month, and when Marissa Goodliffe, who is Chair of SL's Cancer Caregivers Group, realised that there wasn't going to be time to recognize caregivers properly that month, she decided instead to organize a party on December 15 to honor the caregivers in our midst and to invite the caregivers, survivors, and Relay For Life groups affiliated with the American Cancer Society in Second Life. She was helped by Nevar "Santa" Lobo, Pips Fetid, and Synergy Devonshire who put together charming Holiday packages for everyone.

The Holiday Party was one of the most memorable and successful parties I have ever been to in Second Life. I really had a ball. The setting was beautiful - the castle was designed and built by Pips Fetid; the music was great, a medley of seasonal songs put together by DJ Bcreative Wilde; and the conversation and the company was wonderful. And what made it worthwhile was that so many people from the caregivers, survivors and RFL groups turned out, both to enjoy themselves and to celebrate the caregivers whose caring makes such a difference to the lives of those of us touched by cancer. I saw many old friends and made new ones. Thank you so very, very much, Marissa, Nevar, Pips, BCreative (and a Happy Bday!) and Synergy.